When the movie The Day After Tomorrow came out, it really scared me. I believed in it’s possibility.
Every time I get in my car, I feel the shame of our humanity.
Most days, I choose not to drive anywhere but I don’t live where not driving could be a sustainable practice. I don’t want to move and I negotiate with myself about trade-offs. If my hair looks clean, I will wear a shower cap and not wash it. A small savings but I’ve arrived at the understanding for myself that there are no such things as small actions. Every action counts. So when I drive, even being mindful of how aggressively I speed off from a stop counts.
I repeat to myself: “I am responsible”.
For two years now, I’ve been looking at the flat roof on the house and trying to figure out a way to harvest the water from rainfall.
I realize that this is not leading edge thinking. I realize that two years sounds like a long time to be thinking about something. I realize that many have made strides towards living in self-sustaining households but I’m only a step closer to these many and only just taking the first steps and emerging from the overwhelming mass that makes up the rest of us.
Despite good intentions, there seems to be an overwhelm that I experience when I consider stepping out. So I talk myself into it slowly. One tiny action at a time. One less shower. One less take out meal. No more plastic water bottles, only re-usable ones… If I make a list of all the things I’ve done, however small they may seem on their own, over time, collectively, they are something. I try not to make the list of all the things that I still have to change. I just try and notice every time I’m exercising a choice. And that is all the time!
Every action is a choice and I want to be mindful.
So when I find a behavior that I can change , I practice that one thing until it becomes part of my life. No matter how long it takes.
And, to this day, there are moments when I’m conflicted about having seen the movie. Because it confirmed on the big screen what we all know in our gut. What I have known from dreams. Climate change is real. And, the tipping point is closer than what most of us believe. What I don’t like is the fear factor.
Occasionally I feel scared and when I do, I talk myself through it until I’m no longer scared.
I tell myself that we are all in this together.
I tell myself that I’m a drop in the ocean and if I change, then the whole changes.
I am responsible.
I praise my little successes in order to encourage more of the behavior that makes a difference.
and, I take steps, and walk mindfully by putting one foot in front of the other.
In the end, I believe that the Earth will be fine. She will recover if we stop our madness. We owe her that. As for us, the humans that walk on this Earth, it may or may not be too late. Only time will tell.